April 25, 2012

"Crazy Good Sex"

The struggle men have with their own sexuality is a quiet, lonely battle. It’s amazing to me that we can live in a culture that shouts sex from the rooftops, televisions, radio stations, and the internet, yet we are still be so embarrassed to have any real conversations about it.

It shouldn’t be this way, but it is.

Recently I read through a book with a few other men called Crazy Good Sex: Putting To Bed The Myths Men Have About Sex by Les Parrot. It’s a great little book that doesn’t take too much time to get through at all, but that covers some very, very important areas that men need to be talking about more. It is a Christian-based book, but I think the information is worthwhile. From the first chapter:
Men struggle with sex. Especially good men. And many of our sexual struggles stem from our crazy thinking about sex. Why? Because our beliefs determine our behavior. If we believe crazy things about sex, we do crazy things in our sex lives.
It’s so true that our beliefs determine our behavior and all of us should examine where our beliefs come from to see if we need to adjust our behavior. Les Parrot lays out six myths that men often believe, and talks about how they are really messing with the quality of our sex lives. Those myths are:
  1. Men want more sex than women do
  2. Sex with the same person gets boring
  3. Porn is not addictive
  4. Size matters
  5. The Bible is very clear on masturbation
  6. My sex drive is too powerful to control
I read through this book with a few other men. To me, reading books together is the best way to talk about uncomfortable topics. (No one wants to be the one to bring it up, but if an author brings it up, then we might as well go ahead and talk about it.) Discussing the “Size Matters” myth was particularly interesting. Not only was it intriguing to hear that worrying about penis size is such a common thing among men (even happily married men), it was an interesting experience to actually talk about it with other guys. We all know we shouldn’t care, but we all do, and sharing our experiences and thoughts about when we started to feel insecure and why was eye opening.

If you find yourself believing in any of these myths (and they most definitely are all myths), then I’d recommend you pick up a copy of this book. And if you’ve got some close friends that would be up for it, I would highly recommend reading through this together.


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  3. So can you tell us... Why are men afraid to talk about sex? Is it embarrassing to them?