December 15, 2009

Something She Actually Wants

I remember being at a friend's house sometime around the holidays several years ago. This friend's dad loved watching TV. In fact, it was pretty much the only thing he did in his spare time. This friend's mom, however, hardly ever watched TV; she found much more satisfaction in doing other things. So it was pretty funny when I came over and Dad proudly showed me the new TV "he got for mom." Yeah, right.

I was reminded of this story recently when my own father was venting to me about how this year my mom was refusing any of the latest and greatest technological gifts. She said she was tired of having to relearn these things, all to have them become outdated so quickly. She wanted clothes, shoes, household wares. She wanted things that would last. What was so humorous to me was that my dad sounded genuinely irritated that my mom would want those things because he really wanted to get her a Kindle.

We men are funny, aren't we? And while we can go ahead and laugh at our ridiculousness, let's not forget to improve our relationships while we do it. This year, think: What would my wife actually want for Christmas? Make sure you are honestly comparing that with what you want her to have. They are probably not the exact same thing. And I promise you, even if you miss the mark but she can see the effort, she'll love it more than that other thing. Really.

I think some of this goes back to what I wrote on learning to love the same things. We do want those closest to us to be just as interested in the things we love as we are. But in some areas, that can really just come across as selfish.

1 comment:

  1. A very relevant point indeed...Maybe true cariong about thinking about what the other person wants...

    What does my girlfriend really love? She loves chocolates. And I'll go buy her some amazing ones...:)

    Thank you :)