February 28, 2009

Somebody's Daughter — Fighting Pornography

Pornography ruins marriages.  Husbands have gotten so caught up in the sexual addiction of looking at pornography that they have lost everything that they have held dear to them.

And the internet today hasn't made it any easier.  I've heard it said in the past that a man had to actually go and seek pornography if he wanted it, now pornography seeks him.  Before, a man had to have the guts to go into a convenient store and buy a magazine. Now, a few innocent clicks online and men are bombarded by images that will be stored in their minds for years and years.

In a strange turn of events, the hunter has become the hunted.

One odd characteristic of a pornography addiction is that it somehow allows your mind to turn the image of a woman into an object. Somehow our brains do not connect the fact that the women we are lusting after is actually somebody's little girl.  As fathers, it makes us sick with disgust and anger picturing someone objectifying our little girls.  They are our babies.  We greet their dates at the door with a shotgun because we want them to understand one thing very clearly: You will not degrade my baby girl.

But unfortunately, all too many of us will retreat to the computer and degrade other men's baby girls. Why can't we imagine the heartbreak her father would be feeling knowing his daughter was out there doing that, and that men were looking at her in that way?

I stumbled across a website recently that exists to help men confront their addiction to pornography. It is called Somebody's Daughter, and it is entirely based on this principle.  Though I haven't seen the DVD myself, the preview looks great and it is endorsed by the same man who wrote Sex, Men, and God, a book I strongly recommended in our discussion on masturbation in the marriage relationship.

If pornography is something you struggle with, and are tired of struggling with it alone, I strongly recommend you go and check this site out.  Though it may be very difficult journey, you will never be sorry about the decision to get help.  Learn to starve your eyes only for your wife.


  1. but no link to the website.


  2. That is a very good way to reframe our mind to have a godly view on pornography and its destructive force.
    I'm currently going through this course called: Setting Captives Free. It's a pretty good website on helping those who are addicted to pornography to be free from it.

  3. As an agnostic it is a little disheartening to see that all anti pornography methods are faith based.

  4. Somebody's Daughter is a great resources. I loved it when I first saw it. Well-made music videos and everything.

    There are a number of Christian musicians who are speaking out about this today:


  5. I agree the hunter has become the hunted, and the availability of it is growing exponentially.

    However, this is a free country and just like anything else adrenaline based... it can become addictive. (Gambling, Sex, Drugs, Alcohol)
    Weak minded people get hooked on all kinds of things...

    Pornography can help some couples get through sexual dysfunction.
    It can help couples play out their fantasies with out truly involving other people, or even provide ideas to spice up their sex lives.

    This is obviously a heated subject, and there are plenty of people out there who object to all of it, but remember one thing, "FREE WILL"

    God gave it to us... The performers have free will in the production of it, and the viewers have free will to watch it, and if you don't like it you have the freedom to avoid it.

    America is the land of freedom... start playing with that and we all lose.

  6. All things are available, not all are good for you, and some will kill you. LEarn this and teach your children, there are one way door-gates that you cannot return thru. Dont be stupid.

    Why do you think there are laws?????????

  7. This is ALL about FREE WILL... we however, should be aware of the eminent consequences. The pornography will probably "help" some of us in the SHORT TERM, to overcome sexual dysfunction... but when this is the issue, it probably means something much deeper is wrong in the relationship.and involving porn will only cause feelings of inadequacy, insecurity on a deep level. as well as making it more difficult to get aroused by anything "real" with our spouse. I should not need to look at pornographic images in order to get aroused enough to have sex with my spouse. Involving others in our sexual relationship is considered adultery, even LOOKing at others sexually, according to the Bible is considered adultery.

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