June 15, 2008

Traveling With Your Wife

My wife and I will be traveling later this week, and just thinking about fighting the crowds and the uncomfortable layovers puts me in a bad mood. As fun as the destinations are (or should be), the traveling part sure can take its toll on a man. And things just get worse as the exhaustion sets in and as the body finally reacts to staying up late to pack and getting up early to get the airport.

As the travel day (or days) moves on, I notice that I get more and more irritable, and if I'm not careful I can take that irritability out on the woman I love more than anyone else in the world. I know we can probably all relate to seeing the husband who snaps at his wife in the ticket line, or who's yelling at the whole family as we are all waiting to board. He has let the travel stress get to him, and he has embarrassed himself and hurt his family.

I guess I just want to say that when you are traveling this summer and you really start to feel the stress of canceled flights, lost bags, or even just a sick kid in the car, do your best to keep yourself from saying hurtful things to the one you love. She is your partner and she's feeling the stress too, so remind yourself to keep your tongue under control when you are tempted to say something you shouldn't.

And if (when) you do end up saying something hurtful in a moment of weakness, make sure you apologize and explain that you didn't mean it, that you just feel overwhelmed (or exhausted, or frustrated), and that you didn't want to hurt her.

And to make her feel even better, remind her that you love having her with you when you travel.


  1. I found that the last time I traveled with my partner it helped for us to take short breaks to separate and give each other space when the hotel room felt especially small. Usually I'd start the day with a short walk and those days would end up running a lot smoother on the vacation. Just a touch of space to help smooth over being together.

    Everything Will Be Alright - A Journey Through Couples Therapy

  2. Those are really great ideas, i find that this site is full of wonderful ideas. I don't know how most people deal with the travel stress, road rage, or even just an irritating line. I like to remember that we will get to where we are going, and if this is where we are, then at least we are hear together. Look around you in those lines, in traffic, and in the airports, there are plenty of people trying to get home to their loved ones. If yours are there that one thing you need to be thankful for... just an observation.

  3. Make a visit to the cancer ward at your city's hospital some time.

    Your "traveling stress" -- or any other stress for that matter -- won't seem so bad.